Fandom: Sherlock Holmes
Pairing: Holmes/Watson (preslash or implied)
Warnings: Drug use
Disclaimer: Not mine, although actually in the public domain. No profit is intended.
Author’s Note: This is written for the Holmesslash Yahoo group Friday Fives prompt: Five times Holmes tried to kick his cocaine habit, with rather scary results. This doesn’t have five times and the results aren’t really scary, but it is about angsty drug addiction.
Summary: With Watson gone, Holmes’ drug use consumes him.
The needle calls me. Watson would say I was being foolish. He would tell me that I should fight my dependency and reject that sinister narcotic. But Watson is not here; he’s off to his new and happily married life. I remain behind, alone with my bleak thoughts. And the needle calls me.
I tried, I truly did, to put it all behind me. I could see his grief each time I succumbed, his silent agony at my craving. He could no longer watch, he said, as I destroyed my life. And I would stop – for a day, a week, a case. But in the end, I suppose, the lure of the needle was stronger than the regard for my friend.
And now Watson is gone and I am alone. There is no sense, no purpose, no distraction from the terrible and all-consuming call of the needle. There is no friend to share my rooms, my life. I am amazed at how much I depended on him, how much I needed him, how much I valued him, now that he is well and truly gone.
Without conscious thought the needle is in my arm, the plunger depressed, the narcotic dancing through my vein. I lay back, welcoming it, allowing it to ravage my body and calm my mind. It is all I have left in the world.